"He may be president,
but he still comes home and swipes my socks."
-- Joseph P. Kennedy
 |
| A free sock 7-29-14 |
"One can never have enough socks," said Dumbledore.
-- J.K. Rowling,
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
Leo bought three new pairs of snazzy socks yesterday for five dollars.
I am a sucker for snazzy socks. I like to wear them with my motorcycle boots.
So when Leo brought his new socks home -- 2 stripey, 2 camouflaged and 2 color-blocked -- I was a little jealous.
Covetous even.
Yep. I did. I coveted.
I kinda wanted those socks.
I kinda really wanted those socks.
Leo knew this, and so he openly flaunted his new socks as he released them from their little sock-hanger and snipped all the plastic thingies that hold the matching pairs together at the toes.
Then he tried them on it was clear they were a trifle small on his size 14 foot.
I don't know everything about my son, but I do know that if something doesn't fit him comfortably, Leo will not wear it. Too tight, too short, too loose, too itchy, too whatever ... forget it.
So I knew that it was just a matter of time before these really great socks would be relegated to the back of Leo's sock drawer, held captive and imprisoned there, lost and forgotten, confined to a sad life of non-use.
As a champion of snazzy socks everywhere, I simply couldn't let that happen.
I saw my opening and made my move.
I told Leo that if the socks shrank more in the wash -- and surely they would -- I would take pity and take them off his hands, er, feet.
I even offered to give him back his five bucks, just to sweeten the pot.
The hook was set.
He didn't give in right away. He stubbornly tried on all three pairs, like Cinderella's step-sister searching for a shoe that fit.
Finally he gave up and just flung the socks at me.
Him: "You might as well take them now. I'll be giving them to you anyway."
Me: "Yay! Free socks!"
