"I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut."
-- Ellen DeGeneres
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| Barbie with a buzz cut 6-8-14 |
"I remember when your head caught flame
It kissed your scalp and caressed your brain
Well you laughed, baby it's okay
It's buzz cut season anyway."
-- Lorde, "Buzz Cut Season," Pure Heroine
I've been cutting my boys' hair at home ever since Sam was a tiny tot.
After bribing him with Dum-Dums and dragging him kicking and screaming to the barber shop and dropping $15 every few weeks, I started paying attention to what the barber was doing. It looked simple enough. So the next time baby Sam needed a haircut, I went out and bought myself a $25 electric clipper, propped him in his highchair and tried it myself.
Sure there were a few scalpings along the way and I've nipped ears more than once. Luckily, tiny tots don't really care about their hair (but they will squeal if you clip their ears), so I had lots of time to practice before he noticed. By the time Sam was old enough to give a damn about how he looked, I'd pretty much nailed the basics and added Leo and my husband to my client list as well.
Now, I cut everybody's hair except my own. I cut Leo's yesterday outside on the patio listening to the ball game and enjoying a cool late afternoon summer breeze.
I've offered to send them to the barber shop or salon, but they all say they prefer how I cut their hair. The like the convenience. They like the price tag. There's no appointment necessary. I only need about 60 seconds notice and I can have them in the chair and the cape, ready to go.
All three of them have their own particular style, so I have expanded my repertoire. In the summers, Leo wisely comes to me for his football Mohawk while the rest of the guys on the team imprecisely buzz each other's heads.
My $25 clipper has paid for itself hundreds of times over. It's how I earn my keep around here.
I can't do much, but I can do that.
So if you're looking to get a good buzz, I'm definitely your girl.
